You Say It’s Your Birthday

I’m a huge believer in the power of the following statement.

It’s my birthday!

As in, “You have to, it’s my birthday!” or “I want cake for breakfast, it’s my birthday!”

I believe this all started when my parents took me to Disneyland for my birthday one year. We stayed at a Disney hotel, I got a pin that said my name and “It’s my birthday!” and from then on it was a free for all of epic “It’s my birthday” proportions. I found that every time I said it, I got what I wanted. A monster was born.

But just like everyone who humored me on my day, I feel it’s only fair to humor others on their day.

Or, if you’re Joey, your week. So if it’s your birthday, feel free to take advantage.

Open presents.

Drink beer.

Eat burgers.

Have margaritas.

Don’t share your complimentary dessert.

Do wear a sombrero.

Play in your league basketball game after aforementioned margaritas.

Order 10 rolls of sushi.

Still don’t share the complimentary dessert.

Follow up dessert with ice cream.

Drag everyone out to the bars the night before Easter, knowing everyone has to be up early the next day…

Force your girlfriend to be your personal DD for four out of seven days of the week…

And then, for the love of God, put your birthday to rest.

Till next year.